Army Dan
Aliases Cocksucker
Origin The Army
Neglecting Children

Army Dan (not to be confused with Dead Dan) is perhaps most known for his theft of over 200 Super Nintendo game consoles from the BioHouse; despite this fact, he later became a resident. Sources claim that Army Dan headed up past Californee way and back into Washington (the state, not the city, nor the Oregon-incorporated territory) on official army business. Those same sources have intelligence that could lead one to believe Army Dan has deployed Army Daughter to a local "grandma."

Army Dan ExposedEdit

ShirtCharles: "PUT THOSE ON!"
BioSis: (giggling) "Is that Dan's pants?"
ShirtCharles: "What? Army Dan?"
BioMom: That [expletive]
ShirtCharles: (inhale{gasp?})

Army DaughterEdit


BC sitting on Army Daughter's prison.

Known facts:
  1. She's 8 years old.
  2. She probably doesn't attend school.
  3. She spends all day watching BioMom play FFXI.
  4. She's not allowed the leave the couch. Under no circumstances.

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